Lately, I've been filling my 'free' time with listening to Mark Driscoll sermons or reading some kind of theology related text. Prior to this, I'd been watching a few shows online that I enjoy. ...Ones that aren't exactly wholesome, but are strictly entertainment -like America's Next Top Model, or Bones.
Since I've stopped watching mindless TV shows, I've noticed that the rest of my days don't seem as mindless either. I have been struggling lately with finding meaningful things to do - or at least finding meaning and fulfillment in what I do. God has given me to amazing kids, a wonderful husband, and a grand house to take care of. So often, I forget that GOD gave it to me as a responsibility. I just get by and feel like my real calling is doing this and that outside of my home. While in some instances doing some stuff outside is what I should be doing, this season of life is grounded in my family and encouraging them to Christ-likeness.
So! About a month ago I started Driscoll's series on Ecclesiastes. The book of the Bible is all about how doing things is meaningless. Ha. Just what I needed to get out of my toxic funk. Honestly, it was a good kick in the pants. Everything we can do has been done. So, what is the end result? Fear God and keep His commands. Gain wisdom. Live to His glory.
Simple, right? bah. No. In one of the last in the series, I was challenged to read Church History. Know where the Church has been, learn from mistakes, etc. What fights and frustrations we have today are not new. How did our fathers of the faith deal with it? That's what I'm aiming to find out.
How is this shocking? Well, apparently as I was looking up books on Amazon to buy, I started talking to my husband about them. He looked at me as if I had grown a second head. Up until this point, I had not expressed any kind of interest in ancient history, nor really learning from others past mistakes and victories. I was kind of offended, but in the ensuing week, I've realized he was right.
I have needed to get out of my comfort zone and change. I've wanted to grow, but haven't been willing to put in the effort. I've been surprised. I've actually been liking the church history book I've been reading. I'm making mental notes to learn about the different church fathers in more detail....like Origen!
In getting out of this funk, I've started to see my family and house through a different lens. They ARE my privilege to take care of, not an annoyance to tolerate until I have time to myself.
What are you learning, lately?
xo,
Bliss
